Trans World Assurance Blog

The Military Spouse and Deployment

Posted on Wed, Nov 30, 2011

Military Spouse

Whatever your branch of service, and if you’ve experienced, are experiencing or are about to experience the distance caused by your spouse’s deployment, this blog article is for you. In the wake of your significant other’s long-term absence, a lot is going on - both in life and in the mind. Children, if applicable, are growing and changing. Important happenings are occurring that you would love to be able to share – in person. You’re happy, sad, lonely, excited and frustrated. You may have accepted there will be no more hugs or kisses. Intimacy is definitely out the window and a good face to face conversation will be, or is now, a thing of the past.

Don’t let the ebb and flow of a deployment drag your relationship under. There are ways to combat the negativity and keep your marriage on the right path when your spouse is gone.

COMMUNICATION: Whether it’s via email, phone or letters, you have to remember to communicate. If you’re having a hard day, or week, be open and honest about it. Don’t keep things bottled up inside. Let it out! Your spouse is your best friend right now and they need to hear these things almost as badly as you need to dispel them. Leave no pressing subject unrevealed. Even if they don’t ask, please, still tell. Resentment could build if this is not taken care of properly. Everyone will deal with the distance in their own way, but communicating your life and current needs is very important.

STAY POSITIVE: Even if you don’t feel positive, act like it. The above-mentioned communication is a must, but trying to remain positive is really the key. When you get to talk to your spouse, and if nothing terribly important needs to be addressed, tell them about your day; what you did or where you went. Recall funny instances with your children or pets. Talk about friends, family or someone new and interesting you met. Keep the brave face on. It is just as important for your significant other to know you’re having a bad day as it is for them to know you’re also okay. Mastering the technique of balancing positive communication and pressing issues will be hard, but it must be done.

CARE PACKAGES: With an array of care packages to choose from on the Internet, there should be no shortage in sending these. Put your own spin on one and have fun putting it all together. Pick a date each month you want to send one out and think of how excited your spouse will be to receive it.

PUT YOURSELF IN THEIR SHOES: How would you think or feel if you were the one who had to be completely separated from family and friends? Okay, so some days your significant other isn’t the best conversationalist; they only want to discuss work and they don’t even ask about your day. They seem distant or disconnected. Or perhaps they’re even a bit clingy. Either way, take a frustrated step back and try to imagine how you might be handling the distance from their perspective.

REMEMBER, YOU LOVE EACH OTHER: Don’t forget, there is a reason you both are doing this. There is a reason you both signed on. You knew your love had no bounds and that no amount of distance or time could ever truly separate you. Is this one of the hardest things you’ve ever done? Yes, it is. Does the distance and longevity test you mentally on a daily basis? Of course it does. But of all the things listed, this one is the most important. Because no matter how hard or vexing this has been, you must always remember you love each other.


Written by Sarah Shepherd
Sarah is a proud Navy wife and stay at home mom. She enjoys writing freelance articles in her spare time and composes writings on a variety of subjects.

Tags: Trans World Assurance, military move, military spouse, deployment

Surviving a Military Move: A Guide for Spouses

Posted on Fri, Sep 30, 2011

 



transworldassuranceYou’re a military spouse and you expect this, but relocating is a huge undertaking. The idea of packing up your entire life and moving to a new place is very overwhelming. However, the following tips will get you started down the right path and help you get through your move with ease.

Get Organized

A lot of paperwork goes into a military move. First, find out which documents you will be required to have. Get a large expandable folder and keep everything organized. Make several copies of the most important documents because you will be expected to provide a copy to each of the departments and agencies involved in your relocation.

Be Persistent

Although we would all like to believe in military efficiency, those with experience know that’s not always the case. If you are expecting something, whether it be an answer to a question or a necessary document, and you do not receive it, then you need to speak up. Call or go to the department and remind them of what you need. If you are having an especially hard time getting anything done, your spouse’s chain of command may be able to offer some assistance.

Research

There is a wealth of information to help with military moves on the internet. Do some research ahead of time to help you have a better understanding of what you’ll be experiencing. Military OneSource, Military HOMEFRONT, and SMARTWebMove are all excellent sources of information.

Connect

The best source of information are other military families. Most have been through a relocation at least once. If you have a question about something, chances are someone else has already experienced it. Try to connect with families at your new installation. They will have a better idea of the ins and outs of that particular place and will be able to point you in the right direction.

If you’re having a hard time relating to others in your area, there are several online groups that can help. Many of these group’s members include spouses from all over the world and all branches of the military. There are so many support groups on the internet that you can search for one that will best meet your needs and interests.

International Moves

As hard as domestic moves can be, international ones tend to be even more difficult. First, everyone in your family will be required to have a no-fee passport. It does not cost you anything and can only be used for government purposes. You will be using it when you first enter your new country and when you leave it. If you’re planning on doing any traveling while living abroad, you’ll need a tourist passport.

Everyone in your family will also undergo a screening to determine if they are healthy enough to leave the country and live abroad. Any necessary medical procedures will have to be taken care of before you leave.

You should also expect the bulk of your household goods to take several months to arrive at your new home. You will be able to pack vital belongings into a smaller shipment, called unaccompanied baggage, which will get to you much quicker.

Expect the Unexpected

Relocating your family is a big deal! There is so much and so many people involved that getting everything off without a hitch is near impossible. Not everything is going to go exactly as planned. The more you come to terms with this now, the less frustrated you’ll be when it happens.

The life of a military family can be difficult, but it can also be very exciting. You have an opportunity to travel and live in many places all over the country and even throughout the world. The better planned your relocation is, the more you can enjoy this experience!

Tags: transworldassurance, military move, relocation, military spouses